You had a full day.. .You worked all day...You go to your twins' parent meeting at the high school, because they're going to be freshmen next year.. (how did that happen?) You get home, clean up the mess in the kitchen that the family left for you..whilst cursing under your breath.... You're exhausted.. and go to bed.. you're asleep within 5 min.. Then, you are startled awake around midnight by what sounds like someone walking around the front walk of the house and the driveway with what sounds like they're wearing snow shovels for shoes! No, I don' t have super sonic ears.. ok.. well, I do... BUT I ALSO HAVE a shitload of ice all over my driveway and walkaway.. FYI - Please don't come to my house as I'm sure I will lose it in court, once the UPS guy comes to deliver some package and slips... In fact.. I'm thinking of posting a sign in my yard stating for all packages to be delivered up the driveway via the curling method as seen in the Winter Olympics. Prizes may be drawn from mailbox, take any bill you like.
Anyhow, back to the 'HOLY CRAP, who's outside!!!?'... b/c they are REALLY freaking loud.. you try to peek out blinds, but you can't see anything. So you creep down the stairs and look out the little window adjacent to the front door...and still nothing.. so you open the door slightly.. and what do you see???a big ASS deer!.. I don't mean a little doe..... I mean A BIG ASS DEER w/ ANTLERS (it's freaking BAMBO!!!) and he's got 3 of his friends with him...( I think one of them was smoking)... Anyhow, I quietly SHOO them all away.. no problem.. it'll only take about an hour for my BP to regulate.. and I fall back asleep.. and then wouldn't you know it...the SOB +3 came back again. Which I promptly thumped hubby and asked that he take care of it...so.. he creeps down the stairs and slowly opens front door.. and yells 'HEAYAH!' I think one of them ran straight into the side of my neighbor's house...
Tonight...? LOCK and LOAD, baby.. beebee style
